In honor of the 17th anniversary of Clueless this week, here is an update on life according to Cher Horowitz or, in Cher terms,
"HOW TO ROLL WITH THE HOMIES IN 2012":
Tai & Cher worked out with the help of Cher's Buns of Steel video. The 1990s were all about aerobics, thigh master and, well, buns of steel. Today, Cher and her friends would probably be testing the latest barre workout, going to Soul Cycle or practicing Pilates.
Cher wore miniskirts, blazers, midriff baring shirts, mini-dresses and floppy hats. Minus the floppy hats, most of these staples remain in style just with slightly updated patterns & colors.
The Mini Skirt
Gone is the matchy matchy skirt and blazer with both loud patterns and loud colors. The skirt is short, the sleeves are long and the colors are minimalist but with a pop of bold color.
Cher's blazer looks simulated mens wear almost exactly: she paired them with button-ups, trouser socks and collared shirts or cardigans. Todays blazers are sexier & paired with casual bottoms, feminine heels and nothing more than a simple tank top or blouse.
The midriff-baring shirts of the mid-nineties were unstructured and basically T-shirts that looked like they had been placed too long in the dryer (or purchased from the children's department). Today's midriff-bearing shirts are structured and show only the slightest hint of skin rather than the entire belly button.
Cher's minidress is one of the few pieces that would hold up today except for one small detail: the minidress was too mini. Today's minidress is still short but leaves a little more to the imagination. The minidress of today also tends to have more intricate design and is often paired with more conservative sleeves or accessories to balance out the amount of skin on display.
If the minidress that Cher wore could be worn today, we should all pray that the hat that Dionne wore will never be worn again. Today's hat of the moment is the Panama Hat. The brim is wide but the color is neutral and they are sturdy enough to withstand both sun and frequent use.
Cher shunned coffee because she feared it would stunt her growth. Cher today would most likely be visiting the Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf & California's numerous juice bars.
A book designed to prevent cluelessness.
Her phone was a flip phone, her favorite songs were on cassette tapes, and her favorite exercise videos were on VHS. Today, Cher would most likely have a designer iPhone case, an enviable iTunes library and perhaps a Wii for some mid-afternoon tennis.
...some things improve with the passing of time.
And one thing, our final image, does not seem to be an outdated technology:
I would still kill for Cher's motorized closet.
Happy Anniversary, Clueless!